seek professional hel.p
Someone told me "you're only 21"That's not how I feel
Early this year I said that I wanted my life to be totally different by the time I was 21
and that it is
From doing nothing but work to having a new job
an internship
a major
a path
healthier
doesn't mean shit
but pat on the back to me for that
i look at that and think ... creating your own destiny can happen so why not leap for the biggest destiny you'd like to accomplish?
i'll meditate on that later
now a days i'm always doing shit "later"
i procrastinate with so many things in life
but never with my job, which i don't care for that much
i procrastinate with the things that i think are important
it's really all a bunch of bullshit
it's really due to the fact that my patience runs short with long term goals
i like thrills in my life
so when i have to let shit marinate i get bored and forget and slip
i knew that already though.
lately i have not been giving a shit about anyone but my sister
i want to love everyone
but life wont allow me.
later though... later.
i'm an asshole right now.
wanna patch shit up?
don't even think about it
grudges? no. i just don't care.
there is no beef, there is no cow cause there aint no hay stacks, there aint no farm
theres nothing
just matter of negativity
memories, black
so i want nothing to do with.
done.
i know you think about rekindling a spark
dead that
there are no fireworks, there aint no lighter, cause we dont match
anymore. i feel nothing.
most guys my age dont impress me anymore
they've become predictable and boring
just like you
your smile is ugly and your dick is small
you wont be shit in life
so i had to say goodbye
cause im very close to becoming the shit in life
but i feel like shit. zip zero. i smile though cause it aint because of you.
all of that is irrelevant though.
It's dark right now
but i always glow
i've been through this numb shit before
although its a shit hole
theres always that part in me that gets excited cause i know i brighter day is to come
went through it young
just anxious to know when the brighter side will be
thats what that is
im just waiting
didnt wanna end this shit on a good note
but fuck it
